Where are the gentlemen?

I thought things can be easier because I am with men who can protect and at least assist me in my weaknesses as a woman. I thought it is already a basic practice for men to give a hand to women even without being asked. I was wrong, many men are not that dependable as I supposed.

It was a privilege to be hired as a Community Facilitator of a project of the government. I was assigned in in one of the municipality of the province of Apayao together with other co-workers not less than five. Knowing that we have at least three male companions to work in the area, I was delighted because I feel the need of males when going to a completely strange place. My fears seemed to have eased off.

However, after a month of working with them, I fell disappointed in knowing that they cannot be depended on. As strangers in the place, we don’t have any other people to trust except our colleagues. We came here as a team and we are supposed to be taking care of each other because we have no other people whom we can depend on. Though, it is really disappointing that the only people we can trust cannot protect us. We can let go of the unhelpfulness they have shown us during the times when we needed help in carrying our heavy bags. What hurts me so much is that they can leave us in an unsecure situation. They are moving in to their new found boarding house while we will be left in our quarter which is a 30 minutes hike away from the office. There’s only the two of us, both female, who will be left in the quarter. I can’t imagine how they can contain to leave us in this situation. I want to cry in disappointment.

I tried to asses if we have expected too much from them but I know we did just expect what is basic to be practiced by men in our region. We are not those women who demands assistance in everything. In fact, we are not comfortable of asking unnecessary help because we appreciate volunteerism. But with what they have been showing us, we were left with no choice but to direct them to carry something when we cannot wait for them to do it. After all, it is awkward to see women carrying baggage men are lux holding nothing. I can’t help but think of this: awan pay tartaraki da met. Imbag pay ti daduma ta umisakit da…